Wednesday, August 12, 2009

This just in

No version of the new health care plan precludes vampires from biting people. Therefore, it is pro-vampire. In fact, I hear (though I haven't confirmed), the plan calls for citizens to make an appearance in a room of vampires for a five-minute period and take their chances. Those who can't evade the vampires will live forever. It's a socialist plan to help all people live the same amount of time.


Anonymous said...

Scooter, where are you?

Stephanie said...

Scooter -- where are you? We miss you. We've been waiting patiently for you to get settled, but I'm writing vampire snark now so we can't wait any longer.